I don't know why, but when it's gloomy outside (which I love).. and I'm in my kitchen, I feel compelled to write and share my thoughts. It just feels calming and cozy (it literally overtakes me) and that's when I want to invite YOU in. Capture you somehow, cook for you, chat with you or have you in for coffee. I've always loved having friends over. For no reason but to spend time together and talk about everything under the sun. Now having kids, it's like the more the merrier. But, I will admit, it gets harder to do this that I speak of. Only because it's a real plan, it takes time management. I've never been so good with that. I'm more of a "fly by the seat of my pants" kinda girl. I'm learning more and more to work with this "clock" thing. Timing. Ya, it's coming around. I hold it's hand while I look back with my hair blowing in the wind, no shoes on and still see that part of me. I smile. That feeling makes me smile. But, so does the other part of me, the new "keep with the time of day", "make a schedule" side of me. You know why? Because for me, it reminds me that this part of my life includes having children. I wouldn't trade that feeling, ever.
But, things in life come and go; feelings, habits, ideas, friends, weather, you get where I'm going with this!?! So the more I learn this and get comfortable with it, the less I carry any guilt about it. No one ever told me before I had kids, and if they did, it never hit me like it does after having them -that I would carry so much guilt for the things I am not doing for or with them, to the things I am doing for them or with them. I do know that they enrich my life and keep me in check. I like that. They may not like it when I put them in check, but it will come full circle. Eventually. It usually does. Can I add that it makes me feel less guilt for all the things outside of them too. I think that is important to know for yourself. It's so easy to do.
SO with all that said...
I guess, since I spend more time at Facebook lately it has sucked out all the creative flowing writing for me. I find myself getting out just enough to satisfy my creative side (for now -and that's ok) with brief wording for my "status" change. Will I come back and write here again, more often? Not sure. I just feel lucky to still have a few followers that actually read my blog. Thank you. This is where I truly believe in quality, not quantity. Thank you again, readers. You deserve the recognition.
Now to get back to that lovely family I helped create. ..It's time to light up the BBQ! Happy Sunday, friends.